


Petty Derailment

by neosaiyanangel



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Dark Comedy, Gen, Goose Is The Best Distraction Possible (Go Do Something Sneaky), Goose straight up commits murder, Harm to Children, Press x to Flap Wings and Annihilate the Enemy, Something Explodes; Goose Waddles Away In Slow Motion Looking Badass And/Or Hilarious, There's A Goose In My Canon And They Made A Giant Mess Of It, Wahtever You Want But With A Goose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 07:55:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21115340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neosaiyanangel/pseuds/neosaiyanangel
Summary: Anakin is destroyed by the goose. So much for the chosen one.





	Petty Derailment

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Wiccy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wiccy/gifts).

Anakin smiled wide as he turned another corner of the canyon.

This was great! He could  _ smell _ freedom with the Jedi.

Excitedly he began crying, “I’m doing it! I’M DOING—”

Suddenly something white flashed in front of him. It  _ felt _ like an immovable obstacle. Anakin spun his wheel, trying to avoid it. Too late he noticed the spiky mound.

His last thought was a twinge of worry for his mother before he was entirely engulfed by the fireball that his pod had become.

———————

The explosion rocked the crowd. They all screamed in shock at the development, cheers and jeers sounding loudly from everyone.

Qui-Gon winced. “Oh. Uhm. Hm. I guess he wasn’t the chosen one after all.”

Obi-Wan’s gut has wrenched to the right as Anakin’s mother collapsed into a grief-stricken pile. Such a tragic end for a young life.

He ducked down and awkwardly patted the woman on the back. “I...I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Obi-Wan.” Qui-Gon nodded towards the door. “Our business is concluded. We have no reason to stay. We’ll have to find another way to secure the parts”

Obi-Wan cringed. He muttered, “Uhm, bye.” to the grieving mother before he awkwardly shuffled behind his master.

————————

On the track, the white obstruction finished waddling its way over to the crash site. Among the twisted metal and burned flesh it dig around until it gave a honk of victory.

It pulled out a sock, the entirety of it bloody and ash sticking to the partially burned edges. It beat its wings gloriously, another pod dodging around it and meeting a fiery fate against the rocks. Seemingly satisfied for the moment, the creature made its way to the next crash—and its next treasure.

One last little explosion rippled from the destroyed podracer. The bird’s feathers rippled spectacularly in the aftershock, and it fluttered its wings to steady itself. The sight was so impressive that a third podracer crashed as its driver gawked in wonder at the glorious display.

The creature honked in glee. A good haul that day was a reason to celebrate. Too bad this sort of thing didn’t happen every day.


End file.
